update on the state of affairs

Right now I am on my couch with cold 1.5 liter bottle of cesky pivo. I just got back from my parents where my brother and I exchanged registration cards for our cars and the cars themselves. He is taking our parents to our Racha house and he needs my 4x4 for that. His brother in law is also coming. I gave him short instructions on how to use the central differential lock and the de-multiplicator that he is going to use to get there.
My parents are going to stay there for a month and a half. They are bringing all the food with them as there are literally no roads and the closest grocery is at least 5 km away. Romantic isn't it? It is compensated with fantastic views, clean air and cosiness of our highland village.
Now the whining part.
I have a feeling that I am loosing my job or at least that I am slowly and gradually pushed out of the lucky circle where people close to the top managers are enjoying themselves. It is as if I did not do my job well and they slowly trying to get rid of me. Basically, I sold the entire portfolio and right now there are no other objectives or tasks for the future. It might as well mean that the owner is no longer interested in keeping us on board. He has a great team in Moscow. It might mean that they found people better than me and are developing their team here. Basically, I feel less needed than I used to. There are no explicit signs but there are signs. More on that later.

loser notes

Well, it is good that not too many people are reading this journal. I am whining too much to have many readers and frankly this journal was started to put some light on myself, my whining and other things that need a mirror to see them. Here's current whining topics.
I went to Moscow, found a job in the major investment house, worked for 2 years and then quit. Went back to Georgia. Why?
In a year and a half, I went to US, entered PhD program in math, got my Masters, found a teaching job, in 2 years quit and went back to Georgia. Why?
Now I have a wonderful job in investment banking which, I think, I will loose or quit or get fired. Why?
Having all that, what is the lesson and what is it that I should be doing with my life in the next (last?) round?